Safe Page 19

  “What?”

  “Quentin Crisp.” I recognized the name of an old, effeminate, British activist.

  Then he showed me his erotic drawings that had guys with clothes half off or showing bits of unzipped pants revealing underwear with appropriate bulges very evident.

  “These are cool,” I said.

  A bigger smile for a moment or two then his face got serious. “I’m a little scared.”

  “Of what?”

  “Us… knowing you… maybe being your friend… or maybe… maybe more?”

  His hesitation moved me as much as his words. I said, “We’ve been through more than a lot of guys ever go through in their entire lives. I want to be friends, at least friends, maybe even more. What can I do to help?”

  “Did you ask me to go out with you, because you felt sorry for me, or because you wanted a real date or…? I’m scared of you. I’m scared of my feelings for you. I’ve never been in a relationship. I’ve never… I’m a… I’ve never had sex with anybody.”

  “I want to go out with you on a date. I think you’re brave. You draw that comic strip, that’s nerve. I know how it feels to be in the closet.” I touched his arm. “And I think you’re cute.”

  “You do?”

  “I’m not ever going to lie to you.”

  This got another smile from him.

  I put my hand on his arm and left it there. His shoulders relaxed. He stood up, and we embraced.

  He touched my back and slid his right hand to the top of my ass. Then his left hand.

  I pulled him close. Felt the bulge in his pants. I suspected he felt mine. He swayed his hips slightly and let out a soft moan.

  We kissed, his soft lips tentative, his tongue a tiny dart against mine.

  EPILOGUE – A FEW THINGS

  Steve came back to school on that Friday. Jack and I walked in with him, one on each side. Mostly kids didn’t say much. Bert not being around to fuel any kind of stink about me helped a lot. Steve and I defeating Boyer helped even more.

  Over the weeks I worked out, my aches eased, and steadily my ankle got better. Singleton helped monitor the baseball season and prejudice. The possibility for college scholarship offers looked good.

  The reason my parents dropped the whole therapy mess? My grandmother. She didn’t tell me, but my mom did. That night when Grandma arrived, she’d stayed up with my mom and dad until three in the morning. My mom still listens to her. My dad was angry, disappointed, and worried. Grandma helped get them through all that. Turns out Grandma had been through a lot in her many years.

  Someone made a bonfire out of Coach Delahanty’s still Super Glued polyester shorts. Jack denied it was him. It was the night of the conference basketball championship game. The fire was on the pitcher’s mound on the baseball field. The whole thing smelled like hell.

  Jack went to court and with help from the high school counselors and other people got himself declared an emancipated minor. So he was off the hook from his dad. He was going to play baseball back east at a small college that was willing to accept his less than stellar grades and still give him a scholarship.

  I found out Steve could eat enough for half the baseball team. Our first date was pretty tense, until he blurted out over his sixth piece of pizza what was bothering him. He said, “I don’t want to be just a guy you saved and felt sorry for.”

  “I don’t want that either,” I said.

  “Okay.” And he devoured four more pieces of pizza. And two sodas. And a milkshake.

  “You nervous?” I finally asked.

  “I always eat like this. I get hungry.”

  Thin as a rail, ate like half the baseball team, that was a heck of a metabolism.

  I had to drop him off a block from his house on our dates. His whole parental situation was still volatile.

  At the end of our first date, he said, “I’ve been to all your baseball games.” Even in the dark car, I could tell he blushed.

  “I’m sorry. I didn’t notice you.”

  “I didn’t sit like out front where people would see me. I kind of sat out of the way. I like seeing you in your baseball uniform.”

  After kissing for a while and getting our breaths back, I said, “Would you like me to wear my uniform sometime when we get together?”

  “Yeah.” He gulped and whispered, “Can I touch you? When you wear it?”

  “You can touch me right now. And when I wear it for you. And maybe you’d like to see me out of my uniform.” I caressed his chin, touched his eyebrows. “I want to see you too.”

  “You do?”

  “Oh, yeah.”

  I got a new letterman’s jacket. Steve and I saved the old one. Sometimes when we went on dates I let him wear the new one.

  The first time I wore my baseball uniform for him my parents were gone with my sisters for an overnight stay with Grandma. I also took off the uniform. He touched me before and after. And I touched him. And we did other stuff, lots of other stuff.

  ABOUT THE AUTHOR

  Mark Zubro is the author of twenty-six novels and five short stories. His book A Simple Suburban Murder won the Lambda Literary Award for Best Gay Men’s mystery. Alien Quest, his first book in a gay science fiction epic series and Pawn of Satan, his next book in his Paul Turner series are just out. He spends his time reading, writing, napping, and eating chocolate.

  TRADEMARKS ACKNOWLEDGMENT

  The author acknowledges the trademark status and trademark owners of the following wordmarks mentioned in this work of fiction:

  Facebook: Facebook Inc.

  Tweeting: Twitter Inc.

  iPhone: Apple Inc.

  Googled: Google Inc.

  iPod: Apple Inc.

  Winnie the Pooh: The Walt Disney Company

  L.A. Times: Los Angeles Times

  YouTube: YouTube, LLC

  NASCAR: National Association for Stock Car Auto Racing Imc.

  Porsche: Porsche Automobil Holding SE

  Psycho: Paramount Pictures Corporation

  Super Glue: Super Glue Corporation

  Barnes and Noble: Barnes & Noble Inc.

  MLR PRESS AUTHORS

  Featuring a roll call of some of the best writers of gay erotica and mysteries today!

  Derek Adams

  Z. Allora

  Maura Anderson

  Simone Anderson

  Victor J. Banis

  Laura Baumbach

  Helen Beattie

  Ally Blue

  J.P. Bowie

  Barry Brennessel

  Nowell Briscoe

  Jade Buchanan

  James Buchanan

  TA Chase

  Charlie Cochrane

  Karenna Colcroft

  Michael G. Cornelius

  Jamie Craig

  Ethan Day

  Diana DeRicci

  Vivien Dean

  Taylor V. Donovan

  S.J. Frost

  Kimberly Gardner

  Kaje Harper

  Alex Ironrod

  Jambrea Jo Jones

  DC Juris

  AC Katt

  Thomas Kearnes

  Sasha Keegan

  Kiernan Kelly

  K-lee Klein

  Geoffrey Knight

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  Neil S. Plakcy

  Rick R. Reed

  A.M. Riley

  AJ Rose

  Rob Rosen
>
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  DH Starr

  Richard Stevenson

  Christopher Stone

  Liz Strange

  Marshall Thornton

  Lex Valentine

  Haley Walsh

  Mia Watts

  Lynley Wayne

  Missy Welsh

  Ryal Woods

  Stevie Woods

  Lance Zarimba

  Mark Zubro

  Check out titles, both available and forthcoming, at

  www.mlrpress.com

  GLBT RESOURCES

  RAINBOW ROMANCE WRITERS

  Raising the Bar for LGBT Romance

  RRW offers support and advocacy to career-focused authors, expanding the horizons of romance. Changing minds, one heart at a time. www.rainbowromancewriters.com

  THE TREVOR PROJECT

  The Trevor Project operates the only nationwide, around-the-clock crisis and suicide prevention helpline for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and questioning youth. Every day, The Trevor Project saves lives though its free and confidential helpline, its website and its educational services. If you or a friend are feeling lost, alone, confused or in crisis, please call The Trevor Helpline. You’ll be able to speak confidentially with a trained counselor 24/7.

  The Trevor Helpline: 866-488-7386

  On the Web: http://www.thetrevorproject.org/

  THE GAY MEN’S DOMESTIC VIOLENCE PROJECT

  Founded in 1994, The Gay Men’s Domestic Violence Project is a grassroots, non-profit organization founded by a gay male survivor of domestic violence and developed through the strength, contributions and participation of the community. The Gay Men’s Domestic Violence Project supports victims and survivors through education, advocacy and direct services. Understanding that the serious public health issue of domestic violence is not gender specific, we serve men in relationships with men, regardless of how they identify, and stand ready to assist them in navigating through abusive relationships.

  GMDVP Helpline: 800.832.1901

  On the Web: http://gmdvp.org/

  THE GAY & LESBIAN ALLIANCE AGAINST DEFAMATION/GLAAD EN ESPAÑOL

  The Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation (GLAAD) is dedicated to promoting and ensuring fair, accurate and inclusive representation of people and events in the media as a means of eliminating homophobia and discrimination based on gender identity and sexual orientation.

  On the Web: http://www.glaad.org/

  GLAAD en español: http://www.glaad.org/espanol/bienvenido.php

  SERVICEMEMBERS LEGAL DEFENSE NETWORK

  Servicemembers Legal Defense Network is a nonpartisan, nonprofit, legal services, watchdog and policy organization dedicated to ending discrimination against and harassment of military personnel affected by “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” (DADT).The SLDN provides free, confidential legal services to all those impacted by DADT and related discrimination. Since 1993, its inhouse legal team has responded to more than 9,000 requests for assistance. In Congress, it leads the fight to repeal DADT and replace it with a law that ensures equal treatment for every servicemember, regardless of sexual orientation. In the courts, it works to challenge the constitutionality of DADT.

  SLDNCall: 800-538-7418

  PO Box 65301or (202) 328-FAIR

  Washington DC 20035-5301 e-mail: sldn@sldn.org

  On the Web: http://sldn.org/

  THE GLBT NATIONAL HELP CENTER

  The GLBT National Help Center is a nonprofit, tax-exempt organization that is dedicated to meeting the needs of the gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender community and those questioning their sexual orientation and gender identity. It is an outgrowth of the Gay & Lesbian National Hotline, which began in 1996 and now is a primary program of The GLBT National Help Center. It offers several different programs including two national hotlines that help members of the GLBT community talk about the important issues that they are facing in their lives. It helps end the isolation that many people feel, by providing a safe environment on the phone or via the internet to discuss issues that people can’t talk about anywhere else. The GLBT National Help Center also helps other organizations build the infrastructure they need to provide strong support to our community at the local level.

  National Hotline: 1-888-THE-GLNH (1-888-843-4564)

  National Youth Talkline 1-800-246-PRIDE (1-800-246-7743)

  On the Web: http://www.glnh.org/

  e-mail: info@glbtnationalhelpcenter.org

  If you’re a GLBT and questioning student heading off to university, you should know that there are resources on campus for you. Here’s just a sample:

  GLBT SCHOLARSHIP RESOURCES

  http://www.hrc.org/resources/entry/tell-us-about-an-lgbt-scholarship

  Syracuse University

  http://lgbt.syr.edu/

  Texas A&M

  http://glbt.tamu.edu/

  Tulane University

  http://tulane.edu/studentaffairs/oma/lgbt/index.cfm

  University of Alaskahttp://www.uaf.edu/woodcenter/leadership/organizations/active/index.xml?id=61

  University of California, Davis

  http://lgbtrc.ucdavis.edu/

  University of California, San Francisco

  http://lgbt.ucsf.edu/

  University of Colorado

  http://www.colorado.edu/GLBTQRC/

  University of Florida

  http://www.multicultural.ufl.edu/lgbt/

  University of Hawaii, Mānoa

  http://manoa.hawaii.edu/lgbt/

  University of Utah

  http://www.sa.utah.edu/lgbt/

  University of Virginia

  http://www.virginia.edu/deanofstudents/lgbt/

  Vanderbilt University

  http://www.vanderbilt.edu/lgbtqi/